I’m a big fan of the self-care and self-love movement online—obviously. I want to shed a little light on self-care beyond the buzzword we’ve come to know it as. In this episode, I’m sharing how we can create a self-care routine in baby steps.
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Review the Show Notes:
Self-Care Beyond Buzzwords (0:30)
What 2020 Taught Us (4:55)
The Rise of Tiktok (6:15)
One Daily Act of Self-Care (9:45)
Care & Comfort (12:00)
Mentioned in this Episode:
Let’s Connect:
Review the Transcript:
Welcome to some place for everybody where we talk about belonging and being a human in our bodies and living in and learning to love our bodies. I’m your host, Carly someplace. This podcast is brought to you by someplace images, boudoir for everybody, you can see the full show notes at someplace for everybody.com. Now, let’s change some self perspectives.
Hey, y’all, this is Carly someplace. So today, on the heels of talking about the steps of confidence, I want to talk about self care.
And I think that a lot of self care and self love, tend to be buzzwords that go hand in hand.
And while I 100%, respect that, and I think that the movement for self care, and how it’s combined with self love has been amazing and has had a lot of people focus on putting themselves more in the spotlight and putting themselves first which is an amazing thing. I want to talk about the type of self care that is not facemasks and chocolate. As much as I would love every bit of self care to be facemasks and chocolate. I think that self care
in the way that it should be perceived is that self care is an act of self love, there are so many levels of self care, there is a basic level that when struggling, sometimes even with my own depression and anxiety, are really, really hard to care for myself. And that’s like giving myself enough water or brushing my teeth every day, or managing to like get out of bed at a timely manner and not be late and then be stressed out about that. So being able to really just do those basic necessities can be really hard sometimes, when we’re struggling with anything, specifically depression and anxiety is what I have experience with. And I’ve experienced those things. But I know that that is completely looks completely different for everybody. So let’s talk a little bit more about what self care can look like, on a broader spectrum for a lot, just a lot of different scenarios. It’s definitely advertised in the mainstream media as bath bombs and treat yourself to chocolate or you know, a spa day. And those are absolutely forms of self care. Those are kind of treat yourself moments. They’re very valid in self care, but they’re not everything. Because self care still does need to be starting with the basics. So taking care of yourself. And that can look a lot of different ways that can be taking vitamins that can be, especially taking vitamins this time of year, it’s winter, being able to have a little bit of extra sunlight, walking around in the sunshine for a little bit every single day and not just being stuck indoors. There’s so many small aspects of caring for ourselves that are so incredibly important, and not really emphasized within the world of self care, because they don’t, they’re not pretty and shiny. If somebody was like, if you just walk around in the sunshine for 10 minutes a day, you’ll feel better. You’d be like, Yeah, but that’s not okay, cool. But that’s not bath bombs. And that’s not you know, those type of things. And it’s completely understandable to to not look at things like that as self care again, with when I’m depressed, it’s really hard for me to get up. And and I feel like the biggest one that I struggle with is brushing my teeth, which is such a simple act. But it takes so much effort in my brain sometimes. But it is a very, very simple act of self care, I am caring for myself, I’m cleaning my teeth. And same with, again, when I’m depressed, washing my hair is really hard. I’ll throw this out there that since I have brightly dyed hair, it doesn’t get washed as often as maybe other people’s but it’s definitely still a process. And it’s something that I can neglect sometimes. And that ends with, you know, me not feeling great about myself in multiple aspects and being able to do that act of self care is going to change my attitude about myself about how I feel about how I look about how I just feel in general. And so those are the type of Self Care Acts that people really aren’t talking about.
And I want to throw a few bigger ones out there that are really big topics. And I think that if we have to look at some tiny
silver linings of 2020 Even though I know it’s 2021 Yes, I’m aware, it still feels like 2020
If we have to look at some aspects of 2020,
being at home, working from home being stuck at home,
gave people a little bit more of prioritization of self when it came to
expanding their hours to work things in mind you, I don’t have kids, I don’t know what it’s like to have to homeschool and work from home and do all of that at the same time. And I’m sure that that was I commend anybody who did it because I just can’t even imagine. But also with 2020, we saw the rise of Tik Tok and with the rise of Tik Tok, especially within my generation, so Millennials versus, you know, Gen Z, and then being
all over Tik Tok way before us and being like, your old people are here. So, with the rise of tick tock,
there’s so much to be learned from tick tock, and there’s so many people on tick tock, who have made mental health more accessible. There’s a lot of therapists on tick tock, there’s a lot of people who are there and giving free education in one to three minute
bite sized bits. And it’s absolutely amazing. And I think that it’s helped a lot of people to really realize that they’re not alone.
And
in some cases, and I’ve had this, you know, just with some friends personally, being able to see these things on tick tock that are being discussed and talk about, they then reached out and went to therapy and found a real therapist for themselves, not you know, a therapist on Tik Tok who’s speaking to the masses, but somebody who they were interacting with on a regular basis, and being able to have this connection. And being able to untangle your thoughts with a therapist was highly beneficial. I think that therapy is huge, one of the best acts of self care that anybody can do, because it’s taking our problems and our thoughts and our feelings about thoughts, our feelings about other people, our feelings of everything. And in some cases, even being able to wrestle with if we need medication for ADHD, or bipolar, or depression or anxiety, or any of these things and being able to take these and take them to somebody who is trained to help you with them, instead of just struggling with our own demons. And this act of self care of making a choice to go to therapy.
And I’ll say, there’s accessible options for therapy, in the way of even if you can’t go see a real person, there are options like better help and different mental health apps where you’re going to be connected with a therapist who you can actually talk to, from your own home from a safe space from wherever you are. And I’m gonna throw this out there that most of my favorite nonprofits to work with punk rock saves lives, who is just an amazing organization. Punk Rock saves lives focuses a lot on mental health. And they’ve actually made it so that you can have accessible access to care through a couple of those different apps at a discounted price for a little while to get into therapy. And to make that financial step a little bit easier. I can link that in the show notes so that you guys can have access to that as well. And I’m just going to go ahead and throw it out there thanks to Tina. And thanks to punkrock saves lives for even working on getting access things to access to things like that, because it’s so incredibly important. It’s such a huge part of self care. So while I could go on about therapy and different things like this for quite a while, I want to have some actionable steps for you to kind of prioritize your self care. And it takes a lot of taking a really good hard look at yourself, which can be a little bit intimidating. Sometimes I won’t lie. I don’t enjoy doing it all the time. But my first question for you and something that I would really like you to think about and figure out exactly what works best for you is, what is one act of self care can be big, it can be small, it can be anything that I can do daily, that will improve my overall
mental well being, and care for my body. This could be anything, this could be anything. This is, you know, brushing your teeth for a full two minutes. This is just changing things within a routine to better care for yourself in one way or another. And how can you change one small thing in your daily routine, that is going to be a better act of self care for you.
Like I said, it could be big, it could be small, it can be anything you want. But think about it, think about what one thing would be for yourself, that improves overall, what you need. The second part of this is what is one thing that you can do this week. And this doesn’t have to be a part of your daily routine, this could be just something to get off your plate to help care for yourself. And that could be that could be spending time relaxing, that could be scheduling an hour into your schedule this week, to read a book, or just sit and do nothing. And I highly encourage you to not scroll on your phone during that time. But to spend time unplugged. If that’s what you’re gonna do. It could be a bath, it could be cooking dinner, it could be this looks different for everybody. So one thing this week that you can do that is an act of care for yourself, be it relaxation, be it a long walk, be it a girls night with friends, be it something like that. What is one thing that you can do this week, that doesn’t have to be part of your daily routine that will vastly improve your mood, or anything? And the third question on an even broader spectrum is what is one thing this month that you can do that brings you care and comfort? And I think that looking at both of those words, care and comfort? What is something you can do? Could it be? You’ve been meaning to replace your bedsheets for forever? And you need a new set? Could it be that? Could it be finally cleaning out underneath of a cabinet that’s been stressing you out? Can it be just any of those things reorganizing things redoing something that takes stress off of you off of part of your brain that’s been thinking about it. And
I’m over here with a very overactive brain. And I can think of about 85 things on my own list to do in this. And it’s it’s a struggle for me to just narrow things down to one. But everything self love, self care, self confidence, they all come one baby step at a time, it doesn’t have to be this giant leap. So being able to change one small thing that affects you daily, then being able to change one thing that changes your overall tune of your week. And then being able to do something once a month that provides you care and comfort. It could be a physical item, it can be mental health related, it can be anything that you want it to be, but being able to take on one thing a week. And one thing a month, as well as those small daily habits are what are going to sustainably build you your own self care routines. And again,
I know I’ve said this and I know that so much of the media has glamorized bubble Baths and Spa days and chocolates and bath bombs and you know, being able to just read all day, and sometimes that is self care. Sometimes that could be your once a month thing. But we understand that that can’t be a daily thing. That’s not how life works. It’s not how life works. We have jobs, we have families, we have motivation, things to get done. We have projects, we have commitments to so many different things and being able to take just a little bit of time to schedule those things out for yourself have this is my once a month thing.
And maybe once a month isn’t enough and that you need twice a month and that’s okay. Or maybe that weekly thing is something that needs to become an every other day thing. And that’s also okay. But being able to change these habits and consciously make time for yourself. To do these things is a huge act of self care. And that self care is again caring for yourself, caring for yourself physically and mentally and emotionally caring for yourself and how that presents it for you. It’s extremely important. And like I said they’re all baby steps. This isn’t just a rush into it immediately being able to change everything all at once. It doesn’t work.
That way, it doesn’t stick. That way, it doesn’t ever really come to fruition that way, because it’s hard to change everything at once. So when you take baby steps, and you care for yourself in baby steps, eventually those baby steps build up. And you’re going to be caring for yourself more and more, and it is going to become routine, and it’s going to come habit. And in that, you then can look at bigger things. And then maybe it is that you want to take a bubble bath every day.
Maybe that’s it. But you have to build up to that. And you have to not let society tell you that these small acts aren’t self care because they 100% are. And these small acts are what build up to everything, of feeling like we are caring for ourselves. So I encourage you to care for yourself. I encourage you to be kind to yourself every day.
And I encourage you to take a deeper look at what self care means to you, and follow these steps just a little bit.
Thanks so much for listening to someplace for everybody. If you love this episode, would you mind leaving me a review in your favorite podcast app and subscribe to the show. If you’re looking for a community to love on you and support you and your self love Journey, come join our all gender Facebook group someplace for everybody which can be found in the show notes at someplace for everybody.com Until we meet again, be kind to yourself